Leaving for college count down

Less than two weeks until I move my only child into the dorm.  Why is this so hard?  It's time for him to be going off to college.  I've done my job and it's time to let him fly but it is so hard.  I know I'm not alone, I know that there are millions of moms out there going through the same thing.  I know I will survive but there are days that are harder than others!

Since I'm about 98% sure that no one reads my blog it is more of a diary for me I guess.  I do feel very much alone these days.  I may have 300 Facebook friends but I don't feel like I have a true best friend.  I can't even talk to my husband.  I could talk to my family but I don't always feel like they really listen.  I wish I could talk to my husband, he is suppose to be my best friend but when you are married to someone with a mental illness it isn't always easy to talk to them.  Too often they are so self absorbed that they don't hear what you are saying.  They cannot comfort you in the way you need.  Instead they find a way to make your problems a burden to them.  Or worse, they only care about their own problems and do not even hear what you are saying.  I most definitely cannot talk to my child.  He may be a young man but he doesn't need my burdens laid on him right as he is starting the next exciting chapter of his life!

I'm having a pity party for one today.  I miss the one best friend I had who turned out not to be my friend in the end.  I have a few other friends but no one that I feel truly comfortable opening up and laying it all out there.  I'm sure I will feel better tomorrow.

On the THM front - I seem to be stalled at the same weight.  It's been two months on the diet and while I lost 15 pounds that seems to be the most I can lose at the moment.  After Andrew is off to college I will have to jump start something and get things moving.